Hey guys! What’s up?
Long time no see, or read, or type? I don’t know. Life has been really, well, honestly? Kind of awful. I have a lot to type, so let me get started.
I’m going to apologize for not writing any new blog posts lately, but I’m here. I’m going to come back, I can feel it. I’ve been writing a lot in my journal lately, and that’s when I remembered that I had all 111 of you guys to talk to whenever life gets tough or if I ever just wanted to talk about everything that makes me happy, and you guys are just the people!
Lucas dumped me. I guess he just decided that I wasn’t what he wanted anymore. So I let him go. He’s tried breaking up with me before, but I always begged him to stay, but this time, I didn’t want to. I hated feeling like that. I cried. Dear Lord, I sobbed. Later the next day I asked him why he decided to break up with me, and he simply responded with that he got “tired” of me, and the he also called me “annoying.”
I wasn’t understanding though, life was so perfect with him, I thought we were fine, I thought that we were going to live happily ever after, but after he said that to me, he decided that he also wanted to tear me down. He decided to make me feel as if I will never be loved. He told me I was “fake” and that nobody will ever “put up” with my “bullshit.” He told me that everybody would only “pity me” and just overall, he took everything I trusted him, and used it against me. Which honestly? Hurt. Badly.
He decided to tell some of my friends that he “fingered me” and now one of my friends won’t even talk to me, she only gives me dirty looks. He decided to tell all of his guy friends that my favorite holiday was 9/11. The worst part? He decided to brag to everyone that he dumped me, and apparently now he has a thing with another girl. I hope he’s happy now though, because it’s clear he was never happy during those six months with me.
So thank you Lucas. Thank you for being my first true love. My first kiss. My first heartbreak. Thank you for making me feel useless and unloved. But now? I’m picking up the pieces, and I’m moving on, without you on my mind.
I’m in a very good mood right now. I’m happy to be back blogging, I’m happy because a ton of people have been complimenting me on my outfits, I’ve actually felt really beautiful!
I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize how long this was, please dear god forgive me, hahaha.
Until next time bestfriends
someone, somewhere, online.